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June 03, 2004
Renter's Remorse
As you may or may not know (or as you may or may not give a damn about), C and I have been looking for a new apartment. The reasons are myriad:
(actually, the reasons are only 3, but that's ok)
1. Williamsburg. Must. Leave. Williamsburg.
2. Waaaaaaaay too much linoleum.
3. My income has turned C into a huge snob, and I already was a snob before my income.
So, we've been looking further south in brooklyn, for apartments with hardwood floors and dishwashers and actual closets that have actual doors and are deep enough to support actually hangers--you know, all the crap normal people have who don't rent in NYC. We have seen many, many apartments. Many, many crappy apartments. So we bumped what we'd pay up by about $500 and saw a very nice apartment. Very, very nice. And we got it and can move in August 1st. This very nice apartment has wood floors, two bedrooms, two bathrooms, two skylights, four big closets, a dishwasher, an actual WASHER AND DRYER, new appliances, and is on the third floor of a townhouse on a quiet tree lined block.
Fuck you I know I sound like I'm channeling a broker. I can't help it after all this.
I can't wait.
But god, how I feel ill whenever I think about how much it costs.
But dammit all, I've lived like crap for 8 years now, from dorms to student tenements to small studios and back to a hipster tenement. Don't I deserve stainless steel appliances for a monthly rent that could rent me a 2,500 square foot house in metro Detroit with a pool and my own Columbian maid to pick up the used sweat towels from the squash court installed in the finished basement?
I sure hope so.
Posted by me at June 3, 2004 06:09 PM
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Comments
what you guys will pay is alright in my neighborhood, (cr/midget pays 850 for a studio.) its alot wider (mine is 15', typical is about 19', 20' minus wall thickness) than most places, two actual bedrooms (not glorified closets), 2 full baths, washer/dryer, skylights, potential new plasma tv (ill bring halo over) and a stainless steel kitchen. my place is only better cause its a duplex, built in pets and its in a converted church (living room height is about 18'.) the only thing that sucks is now i have to get a bike cause my lazy ass will not walk a block and a half and no yard where i can pass out in the summer and sleep the night away
Posted by: 7072 at June 3, 2004 09:14 PM
"writer of this blog', i apologize but im on a roll. its on the third floor. im lazy, i dont like walking up stairs and im scared ill get drunk and tumble down two flights of stairs and the stoop. then ill sue you cause i got drunk at your place and broke my neck. your fault, cause you should have known better than to live 3 flights up and get me drunk at your place. another thing, since you're both snobs you'll walk down court as opposed to smith and miss the cool mural on smith (kiddy drawings reproduced by nyc graf legends.)
Posted by: 7072 at June 3, 2004 09:21 PM
ironic. you guys will be living on "lu-queer" st
Posted by: 7072 at June 3, 2004 09:22 PM
next time your mom visits, you'll have a "myriad" of churches to take her
Posted by: 7072 at June 3, 2004 09:24 PM
since im an asshole, ill make up for it by cooking you two salt encrusted anything or deep fried butter. yours call. welcome to the neighborhood. where the hipsters live off of bergen or smith/9 st and the old italian guys yell at me to make sure i pick up dog shit even when im stoopin down with a bag in my hand. they probably think im korean
Posted by: 7072 at June 3, 2004 09:27 PM
don't worry, i'll show you where to get a 40 of $1.98 colt 45's. they'll charge you $3.50 for 40's of oe. no jugs. if anyone knows where you can still get oe in a jug please let me know. i will pay top dollar
Posted by: 7072 at June 3, 2004 09:30 PM
ooh! i want a columbian maid!
Posted by: rrc at June 4, 2004 06:52 PM
you are a colombian maid
Posted by: 7072 at June 5, 2004 11:26 AM
come over and clean the dirty boys bathroom, bitch
Posted by: 7072 at June 6, 2004 11:51 PM
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